Bad Bitches

Its been an age since I last blogged  and my, what a lot has happened in that time. 

In summary;

• I've restricted drinking to twice a week meaning 75% of the people in my life are now intolerable.
  
• I'm three glorious months into my health kick and have the self-righteous glow of a wealthy cleric. 
  
• I've moved into a wonderful flat, the only downside being an agoraphobic housemate who has been driving me crazy with her passive aggressive post-its and eerr...dirty protests... Rather than let her creepy whistling piss me off (much) I've decided to use her as my inspiration to work even harder. Yes, 2012 is about being happy, successful and at peace with myself.

So with this new ethos enhancing my life like Photoshop on Madonna's face, you can imagine my amusement at being labelled "over-confident" by three different men. One being a grotesque middle manager who's flirtations are met with deadpan put-downs, the other, an ex who I think has only just discovered fire, and most amusingly, a random date I had. 

This 'date' was with a guy, who despite having an MA in Philosophy or some other subject people who love the sound of their own voice like, seemed rather simple. He spoke only of his last Black girlfriend (alarm bells), who he took to the Seychelles and she dumped him on arrival. After I listened to him bore on about sending her hate mail, mild stalking, prank calls in which he tells her to fuck off and die, and putting photos of attractive girls on his Facebook profile to make said ex jealous, I decided it was time to put the cocktail down and conceal the nearest weapon under my sleeve. On discovering the entire relationship lasted 5 weeks, I told him to seek help (the only words I contributed to our conversation)  He then proceeded to tell me that I obviously hate men and have a massive ego.

After I finished laughing my fine ass off, I though I'd better come on here and vent some faux-feminist rage.

Yes, after all the things I've been through I am still confident. Sometimes, sometimes it's a mask that protects me from the vile creatures that inhabit this world, but mostly I am confident because I know I am a great girl. 

Now, if you're expecting me to lower my standards for you, or be bowled over when you act like a gentleman, or expect me to accept less than the best treatment from you due to your 'status'- then I'm afraid you'll have to suck my metaphorical.  

 Oh and Liz from Zimbabwe...call the police girl!